Be Legendary with @ChrisLBarba

Chris Barba from the New York area was one of my first fans when I still wrote about Rejection Therapy exclusively. That blog was still a wordpress! I was excited to hear that he was coming over to San Francisco for a work event.
Fortunately, we found time to chat.

August 16, 2011. 11:03AM

It was around 11am and I could see the swirl of tourists, locals, and people walk around. The maze of strangers, friends, cashiers, shops, and all of that loveliness around me left a beautiful atmosphere for my senses to feel.

Here I was in San Francisco’s Ferry Building. The backdrop of the shops that try to welcome me is quite overwhelming. The coffee shops, the restuarants, the bookstores, the gelato shop all scream to come over and try us out.

Luckily, Blue Bottle Coffee was empty. It’s one of the best local chains. I ordered a latte and have to say that it’s one of the best.

He texted me with a text that said: “Hey Matt, I’m the guy in the red sweater in front of Blue Bottle Coffee.”

So I looked around and saw the red sweater standing there.

We ended up sitting at two of the five available seats that blue bottle has.

-First, we talked about his work event first. He works for Be Legendary, which is a company that helps people around the world.

For example, his work event in San Francisco consisted of building sandals and other shoes to give to disadvantaged youth in Africa.

-After that, he mentioned that he graduated last year with a Psychology major. I’m in my final year of a Psychology major, so I could greatly resonate with that. He suggested and recommended that I get an internship (which I plan to do) and interact with all the professors.

Since my blog is about connecting with people, then it’s more motivation to talk to professors and build a network in my final year.

-Then we talked about Psychology. One of the best videos that he talked about was the classic bear video about attention. Check it here if you’re interested.

If you are open to opportunities that you are looking for as well as ones that you aren’t looking for, then you’ll see the world with more openness.

-Then we talked about one of the best challenges I did when doing Rejection Therapy. I told him about one of my favorites, where I draw a stick figure of this extremely attractive girl next to me on the bus and ask her out below the drawing. She said she had a boyfriend but then we ended up chatting for 10 minutes.
He was impressed and would contemplate doing his own challenge.

After chatting for a couple of hours, we both had to go on our way. I thanked him for his time and he said the same. He said that if I was in the New York area he’d be glad to tour me around.

Check out his weekly blog at, where he writes about self-improvement and growth.
[Disclosure: Nothing exchanged except ideas.]

Christian Hollingsworth
Christian Hollingsworth

The Ferry building is a perfect place to meet. Just love that place! Would love to have heard your conversation and learn from you both. I'm studying psychology independently at the moment - and it's sure an interesting adventure. So much to learn and think about!

Hugo Martins
Hugo Martins

Just like with you, Chris was one of my first 'fans' too. It's really cool to read his insightful comments that help you reflect even more abut what you wrote, and about life. I'm morose, I don't have the opportunity to move to the United States now and be able to meet with people like you. I didn't really know what Chris has been up to but the points you talked about here seem to come out from a great soul, he's a good example of someone trying to become legendary. That being said, great post and marvelous job in presenting a kind friend!

Chris Barba
Chris Barba

Dude you're awesome! Great post. I really enjoyed our chat, and I know this because we probably talked for 2 hours and it felt like no time at all. I know I've told you this before, but our discussion seriously put the refresh button on my blogging life; and gave me a newfound obsession with social challenges. Not to mention when you put two psychology majors at a table together, you are bound to get an amazing conversation - love the moonwalking bear! As for the book before Ellis, it was Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's, Flow. Really great psychology book on optimal experiences and the context of those experiences. It did take me a little bit to read - I could only do like 30 pages a sitting, but definitely got a lot of interesting things out of it, it's all marked up with red underlining and notes. Again, thanks for the amazing post Matt! It was awesome meeting you in person, and I can't wait for our next encounter!